But new plot twist makes her more enjoyable than ever
The National Enquirer reports that the California Department of Justice has begun an investigation into the death of Anna Nicole Smith starting on Friday with a raid on the houses of former friends known to have connections to Smith’s prescription drug supply.
“The locations searched today are related to doctors who provided medical treatment or prescribed drugs for Anna Nicole Smith or her associates,” California Attorney General Jerry Brown said in a statement.
Smith’s psychiatrist Dr. Khristine Eroshevich has been under investigation by the medical board was just one of their targets. But surprise, surprise, guess who ended up already being at Eroshevich’s house? Howard K. Stern. The plot actually thickens.
So for all those not up to date on the whole conspiracy theory: Howard K. Stern and Larry Birkhead had a homosexual relationship, impregnated Anna Nicole, killed her son Daniel, then her in order to inherit all of her money and escape away in a passionate gay love affair. What’s really crazy about all of this is that now it might actually be true. If it is, I hope the irony of Anna Nicole being knocked off for inheritance money doesn’t escape anybody.
Breaking news: One of Britney Spears’ former security guards Tony “Fat Tony” Barretto appeared in an L.A court on September 17th saying Spears was depressed, might do drugs, and spends too much money. In the recent issue, US weekly reports,
“She has mental problems. With her drug and booze issues, her home is no place for kids to be raised,” said Barretto.
What? Spears might be crazy and drinks too much? This is shocking, really, because I thought shaving your head, attacking paparazzi vehicles with bats, and sucking pacifiers was completely normal behavior. Come on Fat Tony, it’s like you just told us Lance Bass was gay. No shit.
But, I guess cheeto-muching, might-be-drug-doing, suicidal-thought-thinking, she-is-a-sucky-mother-press is better than no press. Her new single “Gimme More” is iTunes’ #3 song this week. It’s also iTunes’ #1 ringtone, and number 18 on “Radio & Records Top 40 National Airplay Chart” according to DMW Daily.
I just downloaded the song now, and, listening to it, I would never call Spears crazy. More like lyrical genius. “Gimme gimme more gimme more gimmie gimme more…” Pure poetry.
Tony Barretto, the “secret witness” in the recent Spears/Federline custody hearing that ordered Spears to attend parenting classes and adhere to random drug testing, is coming forward with stories of erratic behavior, alleged drugging, and well, just more bizarre behavior. After being fired last May for failing to pick up Brit’s hat after she supposedly asked him to three times (he suffers from a mild loss of hearing), he swears his motivation for speaking out is not to get revenge. He is legitimately worried about the safety of the fallen pop star’s two small boys. According to the Daily Mail, “Fat Tony” was quoted as saying:
“She’s unpredictable. No one knows what she’ll do next. That’s what scared me. I don’t know what caused her screaming, whether it was drugs or mental instability. She’d be wailing, making no sense. It was worse at night.”
I can only imagine how Jayden and Sean feel, I mean this even makes me a little scared and I will never come withing 500 miles of the girl. Whether she’s skipping kid birthdays to party in Vegas, giving her 1-year old driving lessons in downtown LA, or taking qualudes before hopping on stage for VMA comeback performaces, I think everyone can agree that ms. Spears is not fit to raise a pet turtle, let alone two children. Thanks to Tony the deaf bodyguard for knocking some sense into this Los Angeles Judge. But let’s be honest, if she can’t bend down and pick up her own effing hat, the instructors over there at parenting school better be amazing miracle workers.
After years of addiction and plastic surgery, Versace looks beat.
According to The Daily Mail, Donnatella Versace’s plastic surgery is beginning to fail, and the 52-year-old’s facelift has started to fall. I can’t decide whether the deeply orange woman with platinum blonde hair looks as though her face has been stomped on by one of her label’s very own shoes, or if it looks more like someone’s melted wax replica of Versace via 1990. The fashion maven’s loss of looks has been blamed on too much sunbathing, a cocaine addiction, and tragedy as a result of her brother being murdered in 1997. The Daily Mail reports:
“She has clung to a long platinum hairstyle, deep tan and the revealing clothes her brand is famous for. No doubt she is equally attached to her plastic surgeon.”
But maybe she should really be ending that relationship and starting a new one…with a psychiatrist. Kids, let this be a warning: put down the peroxide and put on some sunscreen. Oh, yeah, and don’t do drugs.
(3 votes)
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