“Before I started working, I would have said, ‘You know, it’s not really fair, because I didn’t choose this.’ But when you decide to be a part of this profession and put yourself out there, then you kind of have to accept what it is.”

  And by “working” of course she means taking Daddy’s credit card to Bloomies and wreaking havok in the designer jean department.  Take a load off, girl!

She told US magazine Interview: “You never know where something’s going.

“My husband and I are committed to each other and deeply in love.”

Told by the magazine interviewer that she and Urban appeared happy together, she replied: “I don’t ever say that.

What does she mean “deeply committed?” That sounds like you’re stuck with an expensive car that you no longer like but you’re in too much debt to the finance company to ever sell the piece of junk. The only thing left to do is park it in a bad neighborhood and hope it’s stolen.

The way Nicole sounds it seems the only thing left for her to do is park Urban near Pamela Anderson and let nature take its course.

I wonder if it has anything to do with all those years of drinking body shots from Roseanne Barr’s navel. E Online:

The former Roseanne star managed to keep his rehab so low profile no one knew he was even in treatment until he announced his successful completion of the program.

“For my family and myself, I voluntarily took the necessary steps to remain sober the rest of my life,” the 55-year-old actor said in a statement issued by his publicist, Stan Rosenfield.

Whatever the addiction, it’s understandable. Who wouldn’t want to consume enough chemicals to blot out the memory of being in “The Flintstones”?

With one hand attempting to cover her freshly acquired Jolie-esque lips, Spears attempted to exit the parking lot in her Pumpkinmobile while using her other hand to steer. As she tried to make a quick left, with paparazzi by her side, Spears’ tire ran over our sandal-wearing photog’s foot. Spears stopped the car, trapping our guy for what must have seemed like 4 hours. Ouch!

It’s just the latest in a series of traffic disasters for the porky pop princess. She’s basically al-Qaeda with power steering.

Meanwhile, Britney’s visitation privileges with her kids have been revoked until she complies with an unspecified court order. It’s anyone’s guess what the court order is. But my money’s on mandatory driving lessons

“It’s never gonna happen. There is more of a chance that the Yankees are going to win the World Series this year.”

Apparently, the two Mutts and Moms owners just don’t want this dog to have a home…at all costs.  Maybe they’re just pissed because the canine’s haircuts cost more than their monthly salary.  Or maybe they just really hate dogs and this is just a part time gig while they get their online degree from DeVry University.

Paris’ five-day trek to the African country, where she will visit clinics and schools, will be filmed with the hopes of selling it as a reality show titled The Philanthropist.

 I don’t know what’s worse, the fact that Paris is going to be speaking to impressionable young children, or that we may be subjected to it on television.  “What’s up children of Africa!  I’m here to talk to you about stuff, super fun stuff!  Little dogs are super cute and they will totally fit into your Luis Vuitton bag, so ask your parents for one, kay?? Also, when you grow up don’t ever have sex with Rick Salomon if there’s a videotape nearby, that’s really important to remember.  Hmm, what else? The Halloween party at Pure is going to be so hot, you should totally ask your parents if you can go.  Wait, are there direct flights to Vegas?  Try not to sit in coach, it smells bad! Wheeeee! I’m doing good! Byeeee!”

“The locations searched today are related to doctors who provided medical treatment or prescribed drugs for Anna Nicole Smith or her associates,” California Attorney General Jerry Brown said in a statement.

Smith’s psychiatrist Dr. Khristine Eroshevich has been under investigation by the medical board was just one of their targets. But surprise, surprise, guess who ended up already being at Eroshevich’s house? Howard K. Stern. The plot actually thickens.

So for all those not up to date on the whole conspiracy theory: Howard K. Stern and Larry Birkhead had a homosexual relationship, impregnated Anna Nicole, killed her son Daniel, then her in order to inherit all of her money and escape away in a passionate gay love affair. What’s really crazy about all of this is that now it might actually be true. If it is, I hope the irony of Anna Nicole being knocked off for inheritance money doesn’t escape anybody.