Archive for the TV category
Erin
And I bet LC and the gang fake and bake too
Hold the phone, posted that The Hills just may be scripted. Though I’m shocked really. Acting in L.A? Imagine that.
“ Executive producer Adam Divello watches the footage playback and gives the gals notes between takes. We saw them redo one scene with Lauren Conrad and Whitney Port sipping drinks and talking at least a few times,” E! reports.
I don’t know what’s worse, the girls of The Hills pretending to be real, or the effect these tanned, thin with-the-stress-of-a-taxing-social-life, pseudo celebrities have on high school girls in, say, Wisconsin, who perceive them to be real. If “reality” shows are indeed fake, then by the law of opposites, does that mean real life is getting faker?
Then again, if you’re searching for genuine, L.A isn’t the greatest place to start.
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Caroline
And yet I wonder if anyone really cares...
A new celebrity sex tape is floating around cyberspace, but unfortunately it doesn’t seem even the least bit interesting or scandalous. According to The Sun, Desperate Housewives star Eva Longoria and NBA husband Tony Parker have a new “saucy video” involving “intimate scenes.” It’s apparently circulating the internet, but only on paid sites. I’m sorry, but if you’re paying to see a boring married couple have sex, it might be time to take a long look in the mirror and maybe go update your eharmony.com profile or something. And yes, I know Pam Anderson and Tommy Lee were married, but we’re talking about Eva Longoria and Tony Parker here. Let me paint the scene for you: 1 pint-sized mediocre television star and 1 oversized 12 year old look-a-like probably having very normal boring married sex. This is not the next One Night In Paris so put away those credit cards. And to all those people out there who are even remotely famous, for the love of god turn off the goddamn video camera when you go inside the bedroom.
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Erin
Sinking Spice by day, Limo-driver by Night
Victoria Beckham isn’t receiving the warm LA welcome she had hoped. After being in the states for over three months, her star isn’t shining as bright as her signature oversized sunglasses may suggest.
Americans, tired of making fun of her TV show and her book, “That Extra Half an Inch” released in America on August 17, are now making fun of her hats. Turning to her for fashion advice would be like trusting a skinny chef to cater your wedding, or hiring a babysitter with a criminal license to watch your kids after school. When dressed like a limo chauffer, its no surprise the public is more apt to ask her not for fashion advice, but rather for a ride.
Her NBC reality show, “Coming to America” which aired on July 16th was cut from a 6-show series to a 1 hour special due to low ratings, and even lower reviews. The New York Post called the show “an orgy of self-indulgence” and described Beckham herself as “vapid and condescending”. And when The Post calls you vapid and condescending, that’s really saying something. Then again, she’s quoted in the UK’s The Guardian telling a Spanish fashion magazine Chic she never reads books. So maybe vapid is the perfect word.
“I haven’t read a book in my life,” Beckham confesses “I don’t have the time.”
In what has to be an effort to disguise her self-promotion with seemingly cute self-depreciating comments, people still seem to find her still more diva than down-to-earth. Some say she’s dumb. Others say she’s desperate and fame hungry. I say she’s just hungry. The woman looks as though she hasn’t eaten in five days. Maybe six. If I don’t eat every four hours, I turn into a heinous bitch. Posh doesn’t need any more accessories or ugly hats. She just needs a sandwich.
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Saturday, Sep 29th, 2007
Categories: TV
Erin
Your Mom is better than my Dad….take that!
NBC plans to launch a new game show mid November called “My dad is better than your dad.” This reminds me of an issue I’ve long wondered: why is it grade school kids, or even high schoolers with the maturity level of grade school kids, don’t make jokes about your dad. Conversely, the popular retort “your mom” gets tossed around like Britney and Lindsay on celebrity blogs. “Your dad” jokes are seldom made, and if they were, they probably wouldn’t be funny.
Case study of said verbal sparing match between two hypothetical school children:
Chubby boy in the cafeteria asking for you twinkie: “Hey, give me your twinkie.”
You, wanting your twinkie and perturbed at this chubby boy who clearly doesn’t need to consume a twinkie, or anything other than prune juice or flax seed:” No way.”
Chubby boy: “You suck”
You: “Your mom sucks”
Why couldn’t you respond with a “Your dad sucks?” Why is it always the moms? You never hear anyone making responding to an insult like “you’re fat an ugly and stupid and no one likes you” with a “your dad is ugly and stupid and no one likes him.” It would never be acceptable, or funny, to answer a “what were you doing last night” with a “your dad.”
So, it seems, moms get made fun of, while dads get to look awesome on primetime TV.
Hope it’s better than that god awful NASCAR show.
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Wednesday, Sep 26th, 2007
Categories: TV
Caroline
Apparently, she thinks we're all blind idiots
Heidi Montag, Lauren Contrad’s archnemesis in Mtv’s The Hills, has finally come forward, admitting to US Magazine that she had her boobs and nose fixed last spring. Why this actually made the cover of the magazine this week still remains a mystery. Montag says:
“I’ve always been insecure about my body…I hated my nose too. I have my dad’s nose, which is huge. It took up so much of my face, when I looked down, I could see my nose.” Then goes on to say, “Right before I went in, I was like, What if I don’t wake up? Oh, this is scary. Then I thought, I don’t care. If I don’t wake up, it’s worth it. I just wanted it so badly.”
So what we can deduce from this statement is that 1) Montag would rather die under the knife than look like her father 2) Montag probably would have benefited from some sort of college degree and 3) the hit reality series is the perfect role model show for insecure girls around America.
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Mark
Zac Efron is Normal.
Did you know that Zac Efron dates girls? Or at least he dated one girl. If you didn’t know, then you should pick up “Zanessa” at the newsstand. It’s an entire magazine dedicated to the relationship between Efron and Vanessa Hudgens. Did you know Zac Efron likes video games? He was at the “Halo 3” midnight release at Universal City’s Gamestop handing out copies to customers even though he has absolutely nothing to do with the game.
I’ve never seen anyone try so hard to look normal. Since Efron’s the star of “High School Musical,” I’d wager that Disney somehow managed to create a real life Pinocchio from one of their animatronic puppets. It would explain his lifeless eyes, stiff personality and knack for singing and dancing.
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Caroline
Because celebrities can't afford cab fares...
According to KNBC, Kiefter Sutherland, star of the Fox hit series 24, was arrested early this morning for making an illegal U turn while driving home from the Fox Fall Eco-Casino Party. He was arrested on suspicion of DUI and if convicted could serve 5 days in county jail. I’m sorry, but “suspicion”? “If convicted”?? You’re either plastered or you’re not. You either drank those beers or you opted for EANABS (equally attractive non-alcoholic beverages, although “equally attractive” is up for debate) . This case doesn’t warrant a CSI team to come in and launch a full force investigation. The guy blows into a breathalizer, the little nozzle shows that it’s twice the .08 legal limit, he goes downtown. Is he guilty? I guess we’ll have to wait for the October 16th trial date. Oh! the anticipation!
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Wednesday, Sep 19th, 2007
Categories: TV
Guy
Emmys lose to the Patriots
Associated Press published Nielson Media Research’s official numbers today. Turns out one football game is more important than TV’s biggest night of the year. What’s most pathetic about this? It wasn’t even a good game. The Patriots destroyed the Chargers in probably the most unsurprising game of the season so far. So how did the NFL outrank the Emmys? Because award shows are boring. It’s the same reason your parents didn’t get off work when you got Perefect Attendance in sixth grade. Don’t get me wrong. Trophies are great. They serve a fantastic purpose. You can put them on your mantle and when people walk into your house they instantly know that you’re better than them. Best part, you get to maintain a sense of modesty about it. It’s not your fault someone gave you a golden-winged chick with a sphere. But nobody wants to sit through the ceremony. That’s the best part about winning a huge award. They usher you off-stage to get your drink on. No more Ryan Seacrest or contortionist shadow-puppets.
Here’s my idea: no more Emmy show. Have the damn thing but don’t air it. Just post the winners on on a website. Now let’s think up something that’s actually more entertaining than a lack-lustered football game. Like “Survivor: Kodiak, Alaska.” See, it’s not hard.
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Frankly
Proving she is not really a guy, just because she whacks it. Bad aim!
Rosie’s new book describes how, as a child, she beat her hands with a hammer to break bones and get attention. No, no, no! Any real guy will tell you that’s not what you beat on as a child to get attention. Frankly has no problems with GLBTs (even though it sounds like a sandwich at the deli), but, Rosie, if you’re going to whack it, remember this: It’s just a figure of speech! Like blow job…or - well, never mind. If Frankly has to explain it, you just wouldn’t understand…
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(3 votes)
